Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Belonging

I've never felt like I 
fit in...anywhere. 
Not completely,
anywhere... 

Almost-fitting-in,
that's my thing. 
Outside the group, 
or on the periphery,
the outskirts, but close by.

Nonconformist.
Quirky.
Different.
Weird.
Anomaly.

There are moments
when I want to
fit in.
To be the same,
not different.

Outliers 
are outside-
solitary
independent 
alone.

Often
they are...
we are...
I am... 
alone.

I wonder
does everyone 
feel like this?
I wonder
does everyone
yearn to belong?

WAIT.

I don't want to fit in.
I want to belong.
Everyone
wants
to belong.


I do belong. 
I belong to my family,
I belong to my friends,
I belong to my students,
I belong to my words.

Belonging is what I want.

I don't want to fit-in, 
like a cardboard puzzle piece.
I want to belong, 
and I do. 

These thoughts have been rolling around in my brain for a long time. The difference between belonging and fitting in. I'm single with no kids. It's hard to "fit-in". I've never felt like I ever really fit-in anywhere and it hit me recently that I don't want to fit-in, I want to belong. When I start feeling the need to fit-in, I realize it's my insecurity telling me something is wrong. That's brought me comfort. So has this quote, 

I'm grateful that I do belong to the people in my life. They love me for who I am and that's so much better than fitting in!


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15 comments:

  1. Wise words, friend! I think everyone longs for the same thing which makes me wonder, does anyone actually 'fit in'? Have a great week. Miss you!

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  2. Oh my, I think you have read my mind. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I've connected in so many ways and your quote at the end has been echoing in my mind recently!

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  3. I love the thought process you present between belonging and fitting in. I'm having a moment of not "fitting in", too, with my son's recent homecoming nomination--we aren't quite the in-crowd. I will have to ponder about my own "belonging" and find comfort there!

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  4. Yes, you do belong. And you belong right here in this blogging/ SOL community. I always look forward to reading your blog. I find comfort and belonging here.

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  5. Oh my gosh- thinking about the difference between those two words- I'd never done that before. I love your brave, insightful slice today.

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  6. Wow! Glad I clicked on your post. There's lots here to ponder and reflect upon. Especially the quote from T. Roosevelt. Thank you for your honest sharing.

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  7. You left off one of your very important belongs: " I belong to my blogging friends." Your post brings smiles and sunshine and words for pondering. Thanks for writing about belonging today. Love this!

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  8. There truly is a difference between fitting in and belonging and I think this is a lesson that even my students need to learn and understand. God doesn't create with molds. You have been very reflective today...as always!

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  9. That quote is great! And I like the comparison between fitting in and belonging... As an Army brat, I realized that I never fit in one group, but I was often the bridge between groups. I still feel like I have something in common with everyone, and when I feel a little left out (which I've felt a lot in the past two weeks as my three kids are in their new school after we moved across the country and I'm still making friends myself) I try and focus on the positive. Hope you go to sleep tonight feeling full of friends!

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  10. Hmm, I really "got" this slice! I think my constant struggle to fit in is really to belong- I like the way you explained the differences.

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  11. Of COURSE we love you for who you are! You are my first blog commenter/friend and I love you for NOT fitting in! Well...you DO fit in to the GREAT WRITERS club! Smiles! (Jennifer Sniadecki)

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  12. Thanks for a reflection so many of us can identify with. Belonging is way better than fitting in.

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  13. I do understand! Add 15 or so more years and here I am! :) FINALLY I have come to "get"that all God's promises are true for me, too no matter what my life circumstances are like. Looking up...to Jesus and the way God uniquely gifts "His kids" to contribute to His work as part of His family...brings unshakeable belonging!Blessings on your journey Michelle!!

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  14. I love the shift from fitting-in to belonging -- they sound the same, and yet they are so different. Like you, I have always struggled with both, but I too have places where I now belong. You are not alone!

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  15. Love. Your words resonated with mt. The shift from fitting in to belonging. Love.

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